September 28, 2010 still in Changsha (Pronounced like Chungsha)

Today we went to the Embroidery Research Center. Kai was tired and wanted to be held at all times. The only problem is that he does not know how to hold on at all!!! He is light… 16.75 pounds (for now!!!), but he is awkward when holding him because he only wants to be held up front and not really on the hip. He was very good despite it being in the middle of his usual nap time. After the museum, we went to a local shop in a part of town that a Westerner would never venture unless with a guide. The shop owner wanted to hold Kai, but Kai was not having any part of strangers. Even after that event which took at least an hour, we went to get about $500 worth of things for the orphanage donation. Kai was so exhausted, and so were we.

I am wishing now that we were not going to the orphanage. I think I am being selfish in a way to want to see where my baby grew up. I really want to meet the nannies and thank them for taking care of him. I know they loved him, I can see it in the pictures. The assistant director told us the nannies cried a little when he left that morning. I really hope that our guide explains to him that we are not taking him to leave him, but that we are just going to see where he used to live. Another part of me is scared that he will be very upset and wants to stay. Roger says that won’t happen, but it is a deep seeded fear I have. Another reason I do want to go to the orphanage is to see this little orphan girl that has a very serious complex Congenital Heart Defect. I don’t even know if I will be able to see her, but I plan on trying.

Also, just wanted to fill you in... So far, we have not had any issues, except with food. The kid would eat all night. He doesn't know when to stop. If he finishes the last few Cheerios, he will store them in his mouth and not eat them. Like a chipmunk! I really think he thinks he is going to go hungry. Poor little guy. Our guide asked him in Chinese to give her a Cheerio, and he almost cried. She was persistent with him and it kind of frustrated me at the time. I told her he had food issues. He made a pitiful face at her. He is a 2 y/o orphaned child who thinks that he is going to run out of food. One positive thing is that we at least we know that he understands what she is saying. He is really very smart. He protects himself by burying himself in my chest and acting like he was asleep. I love this baby so much and will protect him no matter what.